Greatest Contest Ever vs. Queb’s
Greatest Contest Ever Update.
1. The Arch Biker is eliminated from the Competition on the grounds that as a ‘gay innkeepers’ we already share the same loft to sleep in, I hang out at his work often, and we already eat the same (his) food.
2. Boots (Jon E) is disqualified from the running, because he sent me a photo-shopped picture of me in a Gay Parade. His First entry, a picture of me as Obi Wan Kenobi had Boots running high in the standings, so it’s unfortunate that his second entry disqualified him. Not that there’s anything wrong with being Gay…
3. Quote of the Day: …riding with the Snot Rascle Monsters. -Ali (I think Ali’s talking about those hairy sweaty [because they're cyclist's they're also ugly?] old ugly men who ride bikes.)
So I listened to NPR the other day (the Subie has AM, or FM, or engine rattle) -Pres shurB- is talking like he’s made the USA a better place since he’s taken charge. He’s started up unwinable wars, alienated the rest of the world by bullying them around. Anyhow even in the “greatest country on earth” (which doesn’t have healthcare?!) things are getting worse too. Check out the gap between what Dubya says and does, oh and I think the deficit ballooned, and big bro’s watching.
-Speaking of ‘fibs’, I got called on one of my own. July 15th’s post I mentioned ’seeing a girls panties in the airport’. Well truth be told, there was a woman, in O’Hare airport, but I SAW NO PANTIES.
Sorry to mis-lead you.
HeyI remembered that I’ve been a Gay Innkeeper for almost a week now and haven’t let you in on it. Well I’ve been busy with e-bay (hint: tomorrow evening I will be listing a very special bike frame that won the Giro and isn’t set to be released until 2005.. so check my auctions later in the week to see this marque item) because the Inn www.federalhouseinn.com has wireless internet.
Since mid June I haven’t slept in the same bed more than 3 nights running, and it’s been catching up. So instead of driving up to Montreal all last weekend, I bailed at the 11th hour to rest, recover, and get back on my feet. Sorry to the Maple Leaf boys for flaking out. When you’re flat you’ve gotta rest or train more, and training was NOT helping me.
Now why is it that this (almost) 200 year old B & B is giving me free room & board? It seems that it’s law that ‘an official’ person sleep here at night, incase of fire, or what have you. And as it turned out after I helped myself to breakfast for 6 consecutive meals, we aren’t supposed to be eating the food, just sleeping here.
-D’oh.
-Don’t use any towels
-I can use some sheets
-And one Blanket. Umm OK.
-Always lock the doors
-Strawberries are for paying guest’s breakfasts
Yup, you know 8h. later I’d locked myself out in the dark and ended up having to tinkerbell my way in through the window.
Of course it was the Maid who ratted me out, then she though I was mocking her. Me, Mock? But we’re friends now. She’s one of those people who though all Canadians speak French as a first language (seriously there are a lot of those) and wonders how I have such a slight accent when I speak ENGLISH.
FOR THE RECORD:
A Canadian (from Canada, and not Quebec) and a Queb (from Quebec) are walking along the beach one day when they come across a lantern half buried in the sand. They pick it up and start to clean it up, when <> out hops a genie.
Genie: Oh thank you for rescuing me from 1000 years of being trapped in a bottle. As a reward I’ll grant you each one wish.
Queb: Merci, even ‘doe ‘dee French peepholes represent only a small pear/centage of ‘dee Ka/nay/dienne tax pay-yers, We have our own dee/stinct culture, et je pense que, we should ‘ave two wish-as for ‘dee French in Kay-beck
Genie: I don’t think logic is present in your arguement…
Queb: Well ‘den, in ‘dat case, I wish for you to build a wall, 50 feet ‘eye, a-round the ‘ole of the Prov-ence of Kay-beck
Wham-o, just like that there was a huge wall surrounding the Province of Quebec
Canadian: (smiling) Could you please just fill it with water.
Yeah, so I guess what I’m going on aboot, is that I grew up speaking English, which is why it’s really hard to notice my French accent when I talk, eh!
Oh.. so what’s the gay part aboot being an Innkeeper. I’m not really sure. It could be because innkeeping is just ‘gay’ in general, or that the ArchBiker and I were each given separate rooms, but chose to share one.
Speaking of the AB, he’s been having a rough day. After getting DQ’ed from the world’s greatest contest, his Jag, with him in it recieved a Loaded Freight Liner from behind, with a vector impact of 30 mph.
Anyhow, I need to get off to bed. Peace
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